Friday, February 20, 2009

Infowars Serious News with Comedic Satire 2/20/09



CNN - France sends police to quell Guadeloupe violence



"The pillaging ... the violence against people, are not tolerable and will not be tolerated," Alliot-Marie told the French radio station RTL. "It's no longer simply a question of containing the protests. ... This mission of honor will continue to be undertaken, but we also have to fight against the violence." (from the article, duh)

Okay, so that isn't the French riot police up there in that picture, but it's close enough. So France is falling apart and the the wineries are apparently not pumping enough out.

The funniest part of it all is that not only is France rioting, it's the first time France has ever had a spine to fight. Hell, I was surprised to hear that France actually has a real military! Do they shoot Daisy air pistols? I bet they've never even seen a real clip for a 9mm, much less the gun.

Seriously though, is this shit gonna hit the United States? If so, then can we get the riot cops to wear those masks? If so then maybe the unrest will be less because we can't stop laughing. Although, when people in the US start ripping apart cars and throwing molotov cocktails, I have a feeling we'll have M-16s in our faces...

Remember the kindness of our own military.


Little Elian Gonzalez was a MAJOR THREAT to domestic problems.

ABC WPBF News Channel 25 - PBSO Plans To Draw Blood At DUI Checkpoints



An Asian cop ready to get your alcohol-filled blood.

Okay, so we have cops illegally forcing people to have their blood drawn due to drunk driving? What the hell happened to safety? Are the cops going to reuse the needles? Do they even know HOW TO DRAW BLOOD? I know they do by biting your neck, then stealing your pot because they are a corrupt asswipe on a power trip.

Now the cops here are on power drips.... The obvious solution to this problem is to only drink and drive if you are on a rampage or just robbed a crackhead that just narced about a drunk driver. Better yet, drink at your house until you puke because you aren't in a damn car.

Remember if you feel the need to drink and drive, then use this:


No cop will stop you in this!

Chicago Sun Times - Obama beats out Jesus as America's hero



I guess I was wrong all those months I was saying Obama is not the new Messiah. As you can see above, it's obvious that Obama likes goats, not dogs, as a pet. I wonder WWOD if Jesus walked up. In fact WWJD do if Obama walked up?

Is there going to be a god of light battle of Biblical preaching? I have to say that Jesus is gonna win given the fact that he has proven power, such as rising from the dead, whereas Obama's best power is giving a speech while he's blazed.


The fight will be interesting as Obama has yet to be crucified, but we know Jesus can take the pain. I am wondering who will win this new interdimensional spiritual battle, and exactly how does a Messiah stimulus plan work in a bad economy? Maybe Jesus should show up Obama by feeding 5000 with just a few fish and loaves of bread.

Can you beat that Obama? Doesn't cost one tax dollar! Call 1-800-BIG-FITE for information regarding the $300 fight on pay-per-view.

The Right Perspective - Putin Warns US about Socialism



Well when Russia is warning you that shit is gonna go down, you might want to freakin' listen. Plus the guy's name is pronounced "Pootin," which makes it a tad bit funnier.



Wow, this guy hated Bush, now he hates Obama, and we're entering what appears to be a new civil war within a few months? We have the Mexican drug war moving in, currently 29 states ready to secede, some with militias full of homicidal maniacs, and now we have fascist socialism all up in Obama's butt.

This is bad, but then look at this. We have... a brigade of National Guard troops practicing urban warfare in a neighborhood near you!

Iowa Daily News Herald and Infowars - Iowa National Guard to Train for Gun Confiscation


Here's a concerned citizen's video about this bullshit.



Now, here is your nihilism toward what is happening because you are a giant wuss.



So, you hipsters, emo kiddies, goth wannabes, New Age morons, preppy fluoridated brainless idiots, etc, all need to WAKE THE HELL UP and say fuck the military coming in like a bunch of COMMIES and practicing like they're in a 3rd world country like Iraq or Afghanistan.

Maybe they will confiscate your BB guns too. The military just wants what's best for you. That's why we have hundreds of FEMA internment camps being filled with the grasshoppers from Mexico.

A new movie, called, Mexican Mafia War is about to be released starring Antonio Banderas as Zorro fighting Chuck Norris style. The biggest question of all is, why does Zorro dress like such a queer? Chuck Norris vs. Zorro... Let's see!


Actual footage of a Chuck Norris fight from the 1980s.


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